Hope everyone had a nice Mother's Day weekend. I bought my Mom a pashmina but I don't know why, every single present I give to her it's "Why do you waste money like this?" Such the archtypical Asian mother.
On a lighter note, this weekend was my first experience with Eurovision! Craig and Chris have been talking about it for weeks, but again I'm at a loss as to why because they were basically saying, "Oh, it's such shit. Ugh, hours of utter crap. Sooo corny. OMG it's awful. You have to watch it."
But my American doods, they were right. It was gloriously shitty! Absolutely craptacular!
And this year it was held in Finland, homeland of the company I work for, so I thought it rather fitting that I watch.
Words I would use to describe the inexplicable phenomenon known as Eurovision:
- What the hell?
- What the fuck is he wearing?
- What the fuck is she wearing?
- Scandenavians love the goth.
- Europeans love the ambiguous gender.
- There will only be one Ricky Martin. Please keep it this way.
- Teenage girls in private school outfits are a safe bet but surprisingly not a winner.
- What the fuck?
After about half the performances (and two large bottles of cider) I got into the spirit of things and had a clear favorite (favourite!): Ukraine
Because honestly, HOW FABULOUS ARE THEY??
I love them so much, I've ventured into the pits of You Tube to bring you the latest in blog technology to view their performance. I don't advise you to watch this if you have epilepsy.
But much to my dismay the rest of Europe decided that the honors would go to Serbia. They were ok I guess, but the most I can say about them is that Craig and I were arguing whether the lead singer looked more like Hiro Nakamura or Harry Potter. Yeah, the singer's a woman.
And yes, they are holding hands to form little red hearts with each hand showing half a heart.
Apparently there always a lot of talk about "political block" voting, like all bajillion former Russian states voting for each other (fraternization) and for Russia ("please don't invade us"). So then the western countries complain that they'll never get enough votes to win. I think that's just a lot of whining. First of all, any country with proper music (ie the UK) does not need to win.
And anyway, they shouldn't complain about coming in second to last when you submit lame crap like this:
Ba-ba-da, Ba-ba-da, Ba-da-da-ba, ba-da
Some salted nuts sir ?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Ba-ba-da, Ba-ba-da, Ba-da-da-ba, ba-da
I understand what they're trying to do, because Eurovision is known to be cheesy and awful and corny and lame. But it's a fine line and they either went not close enough to the line or too far over it.
Compare those lyrics to Ukraine who I think really set the standard and got it just right:
Hello everybody!
My name is Verka Serdyuchka
Me English don't understand!
Let's speak DANCE!
Seven, seven, ai lyu lyu
Seven, seven, one, two
Seven, seven, ai lyu lyu
One, two, three!
Dance!
Ukraine - that's cool?!
Cool!
Ukraine - that's reat?!
Reat!
The square is dancing!
Ok! Happy end
Well done, my good man (woman?). Well done.
