dissonance

Get out of my heeeaaad!!

Have you seen the latest US Postal service ad campaign? It's got the catchiest song and now it's stuck in my head.  If I'm going down, I'm taking everyone with me.

I'm gonna wrap myself in paper
I'm gonna daub myself with glue
Stick some stamps on the top of my head
I'm gonna mail myself to you

I'm gonna tie me up with a little red string
I'm gonna tie blue ribbons too
I'm gonna climb up in my mailbox
I'm gonna mail myself to you

It's called Mail Myself to You by Woody Guthrie.

Think of the children!

I finished  Part 1 of the Bartimaeus trilogy and I take back what I said about it being turned into a movie.

Don't get me wrong. It was good and I liked it a lot.  But if right-wing mothers get their panties in a knot about Harry Potter, there is no way Bartimaeus is going to hit the theaters anytime soon. Bartimeaus makes Harry Potter look like Sunday school reading material.

Let me give you a rundown of the heretic things found in this book:

Magicians - These are not the kind that pull rabbits out of a hat, although this type is mentioned in passing.  These are more like wizards, kind of like Harry Potter.

Demons - But instead of manipulating potions and spells, these wizards manipulate demons. DEMONS!  But in this book they are called "djinni". That made my eyes cross until I figured out it's pronounced "genie". Yup.  I thought that was pretty interesting, with lots of parallels like being able to trap them into objects and have them obey your every command.  At any rate, the magicians use demons to do their bidding.  Do you see the panties twisting yet?

Pentacles - The demons are summoned and controlled by drawing pentacles on the floor.  Pentacles, my dear reader, are commonly associated with witches and satanism. Yup, go to google and type "define: pentacle" for the blasphemy.

Besides pentacles, other 'evil tools' these magicians use are incense, colored candles, incantations, and all sorts of things that would make those panties unrecognizable.

But it was a good book.

It was an imaginative and highly entertaining book about a boy and his djinni.  Intrigue, adventure, murder, mystery, mixed with some very dry humor in the form of footnotes made this an enjoyable read.  I'm definately going to read the next one and pre-ordering number 3. (On a side note, I like the Harry Potter series more. His world had more depth.)

It reminds me of another fabulous trilogy entitled His Dark Materials.  Let me take a fruity moment and proclaim again that this series is FAB-U-LOUS.  But boy, heretic to the core.  I will take another time to run down why it's so heretic but I stand firm in saying that it's brilliant.

Anyway, as long as there's people out there whose faith can be shaken by a child's book, Bartimeaus will never darken theaters. Which is a shame.  Isn't the essence of faith something that can withstand tests?

Dammit, I just figured out that heretic is a noun and I've been using it wrong for this entire entry but I'm too lazy to fix it. So in your head, please replace all instances of "heretic" with "e-e-e-e-evil ooooooo".

Turkey lurkey day

I spent Thanksgiving with Alana's family in Escondido. Hope everyone had as good a time as I did!

I'll let the pictures do the talking.

Alana's cute cute cute nephew, Austin, is on the verge of walking.  This time last year he was still in Samara's tummy. Unbelievable!

Alana's cousin, Kyle was engrossed with his jumbo Lego's most of the night.  When I asked him what he was building replied
"Magic Mountain. But it's not open yet."
"When does it open?"
"6 o'clock pm"

Sooooo yummmmmy!

But it didn't get in the way of my appetite for THIS:

However, I'm so full I don't think I can ever eat again.  Which is a good thing 'cause by around this time next week I have to somehow fit into this:

Darth Vader wake up call

www.target.com/wakeup

Wish they had more celebrities.

The only good thing about commercials

Last night I was chatting with one of my music buddies, Anson, and I was reminded of how I like a lot of songs used in commercials.  I may be a pawn of marketing, but I think I've actually found a lot of artists this way.  Here are a few notables:

• Nissan Armada - Surfin on a Rocket (Air)
• Gap - Lovely Day (Bill Withers)
• Country Time Lemonade - Easy Living (Billie Holiday)
• Volkswagon Touareg - Ariel Ramirez (Richard Buckner)
• Gap - Summer Breeze (Seals and Crofts)
• Mitsubishi - Days go By (Dirty Vegas)

Hmm anyone know some more?

McDonald's "I'm lovin it" featuring Justin Timberlake will not be acknowledged.

Here is a site for looking up songs. It has a horrible interface (search button doesn't even work), but it will do.

On the flip side, two songs used in commercials that I think *should* be full length songs available for purchase are

• The song used in the SD Zoo commercial
• The song used in Nike's "Move" campaign

Define "help"

I'm already thinking about Christmas presents and the one that is burning my brain is a present for my Dad. This is because I am a Bad Only Child and I kind of forgot his birthday last week. I say "kind of" because I technically remembered in time for his Korean birthday, which goes by a lunar calendar and thus falls about a week later than the Anglo-Saxon Western birthday.

So my guilt has me thinking Christmas better be a good one for daddy.  I'm thinking of getting him a nice sports watch. The one he currently uses is from Walmart I think, and the band has broken about a million times and I swear the last time I saw it he has it in place with some string.  STRING.

Not knowing a thing about sports watches, I googled for some answers and voila, I find a page entitled How to buy a sports watch as a gift. How apropos!

What follows is the world's most useless article ever:

1. Choose a sports watch with basic features if you're not buying it for a specific sport. These include alarm(s), water resistance, a timer or stopwatch function, an illuminator and the original band.
Hmm yes, "Buy basic when advanced is too much".  Ohh really??

2. Opt for more advanced features if you know they will be used by the wearer. These can include altimeter, barometer, thermometer, compass and data-link features.
"Get more advanced if the wearer can use it".

3. Choose a sport-specific watch if you know what sports the recipient enjoys. These include specialized watches for divers, runners, surfers, etc.
This is more of a reminder than advice. Also, I don't think they make golf watches (I should double check) so this doesn't even apply to me.

4. Look for a man's or a woman's watch, whichever is appropriate.
Dangit, I thought I could save money by buying my dad a lady's watch.

5. Be sure the band will fit comfortably around the person's wrist. It should be somewhat adjustable.
But I thought a sports watch with an non-adjustable metal band reminiscent of handcuffs would be so cool.

6. Check the guarantee and return policies so that the watch can be returned if another model is desired.
Ok semi-useful reminder.

7. Give a gift certificate, if you're not sure which model the recipient would like. Trying to choose from such a large selection of sports watches by different manufacturers can be mind-boggling.
Gift certificate?? Are you really giving me "gift certificate" as "advice"???  And yes, it can be mind-boggling. Thank you for wasting five minutes of my time reading your useless advice and another 10 minutes writing about how useless you are!!

I just want to know how someone can be paid to write this crap and then be listed on page one of Google.

Can anyone else help me?

---- I just realized that linking to that article does not help my complaint about how it is listed so high on google. Oh well.

Rules of Kings Cup

Ace - To the face
2 - Secret word
3 - Make a rule
4 - Hit the floor
5 - Up high
6 -  Waterfall Left
7 - Waterfall Right
8 - Pick a mate
9 - Bust a rhyme
10 - Categories
Jack - Goes back
Queen - Questions
King - in the cup (if it's the last one, the cup runneth over! Drink it!)

Randomness

We've been getting a lot of nice sunsets lately. I tried taking a picture out of my moonroof.

But I think I freaked some other drivers out with the flash going off and I didn't get a very good shot. So here's another one I took through the windshield:

Also, I got some new knitting needles:

The ones on the left are as huge as they look (I put the phone next to it for reference).  As my knitting friend put it, "Whales mating".  Hey she said it, not me.  Those ones to the right that look like toothpicks are needles for sock making.

And finally, straight from europe, I'd like to present the the delectable confection known as:

It's very popular at work.

PSA

Peppermint mochas are available only on Wednesdays at Starbucks.

If it's not a Wednesday, I highly recommend the Rasberry Tea Latte at Coffee Bean.

That is all.

Come here, you need a hug

I'm driving home yesterday and I hear a new song on the radio, "Thugs Get Lonely Too" by Tupac.  How does he do it?  The guy died like 8 years ago and he's still releasing songs!

The title of the song is almost cute.  I say "almost" because it is my understanding that you are to never call anything that a thug does or says "cute".  But awww, they're lonely!  So that's why they seek drugs, violence, and slutty women! It's 'cause they're lonely.